Type - Human Cowboy Alien
Special abilities: Narrate: TheNarratorOfBastion must narrate everything that happens to each player for the next 3 turns, omitting the narration of himself. At the end of each person's turn, he may decide to either prevent the next 4 damage that would be dealt to them, or sack 'em good, dealing damage equal to the number of letters in their username divided by 2. This may not deal more than 7 damage.
School wasn't all that great anyway: Pick a player. That player must list off 5 things they didn't like in school within 7 seconds. If they can't list off 5 unique and non-repeating items each time, this ability deals 9 damage to that player but may not be used for another 15 turns. This ability may not deal more than 9 damage to any one player, and after dealing damage may not be used twice on the same player.
Karma wave: This attack deals damage equal to the number of enemy players to all enemy players and heals all allies equal to the number of allies. Use this only once per game if you are playing with more than 4 players, totaled up from both sides.
Passive Abilities: novelty shield: TheNarratorOfBastion's novelty account status grants him a slight mental shield against the Downvotias. These creatures exist on a different plane of existence and really dislike certain forms of creativity from our dimension. Thus, are eventually bound to conflict with novelties like TheNarratorOfBastion. This shield he has prevents the first 5 damage done to TheNarratorOfBastion and grants him +3 Str and Int. Once 5 damage has been prevented it is then exhausted and all bonuses are removed for the rest of the game .
odd folk hanging about: If your team has an odd number of players, all players gain +2 to Str and Dex for the rest of the game. If the enemy team has an odd number of players, they lose 2 Str and Dex for the rest of the game. Whenever an attack that deals an odd amount of damage affects one of your allies, prevent 1 of that damge. Whenever an attack that deals an odd amount of damage affects one of your foes, increase that effective amount of damage by 1.
TheNarratorOfBastion is said by some to have originated on another planet. I don't know if I believe it or not but he says his true name is Rucks, but he prefers to go by TheNarratorOfBastion so others may catch on to what he does more easily. Nobody knows much of anything about him, he mainly just describes what he hears and sees often in a strange dialect and a knack for vagueness. He seems to have an inherent affinity for strong magicks, which prevents anyone from potentially messing with him to gain his knowledge. I let him be, but I wonder sometimes, if he ever longs to go back to his home. - an observer's notes on TheNarratorOfBastion.