Special abilities: Fuck mother brain: Pick a player on the enemy team to be the "mother brain." Both of you are locked in a battle to the death and may only attack each other until one of you is slain. No other player may heal, attack, or buff either of you. Use this only once per game.
Fuck Turrets: Find something to represent a turret. Place this in front of you. Players may only attack pieguyfry22 if this turret is destroyed. The turret has 6 Hp, and 3 of every stat. It can shoot lasers once per turn which deal 1 damage to each enemy player regardless of the ability Fuck Mother Brain. This turret cannot move. Use this only once every 10 turns and if there is no current turret.
Passive Abilities: And Fuck Flying Energy Bagels: Whenever pieguyfry22 or anything he controls attacks he should say "And Fuck Flying Energy Bagels." If he remembers to, any attack deals an extra 2 damage and is considered an energy attack. If he forgets, pieguyfry22 is hurt by 2 energy damage and gains nothing.